Friday, February 19, 2010

GOING FOR THE GOLD



Homeboys & Homegirls. I am writing as of this very moment from the mouth of madness, Vancouver, BC, Canada where they are having this little shindig called the 2010 Winter Olympixxx. Imagine, if you will, what it's like when the bars let out at the end of the night: the bleary eyes, the yelling, the falling down, the trio of dudes in red spandex with jamboxes strapped to their backs playing Dutch techno...Now imagine that going on all day long. Yeah, well I don't have to imagine shit, because it's all around me. Like when I'm just trying to go get a cup of coffee in the morning, BLAMMO, Dutch techno. So where is this all going? Simple. Drinkin' often leads to eatin', and it even more often leads to makin' new friends, and I am doin' both. Being a cultural ambassador has lead me to discover that the rumours I'd been hearing happen to be very true: Vancouver, BC has good some good-ass dogs.



So, I was in a rush and didn't have too much time to linger this day but I'd been told the night before about Dougie Dog. It sounded pretty legit, so I figured I'd kill two dogs with one stone and hit it alongside a Vancouver legend, Japadog. Well, whatevs to that plan. Japadog is under construction and I didn't feel like messing with the lineup at the cart. But, we'll get to that another day. Instead, I wanna talk about a little slice of heaven. Look up at that insane dog statue, it's lathering itself up for my enjoyment. When I saw that, a smile kidnapped my face, i think i even tried to hug someone walking by. I floated in. I was so ready, I knew I was going to leave one happy dude. The first thing I noticed is that there s a shit-ton of dogs available, 2 menus! Second was the Vienna beef signs. Hell. Yes. Then, all the root beers. I started slobbering, and this little kid with a mohawk looked at me like I was some sort of derelict bum, but I wasn't gonna let him freeze me out; he was about to break into a chilidog and some Mac n Cheese, so he was not only about to understand why I had that glazed look, but also about to look like a sloppy little delinquent, so we were even.
It only took me about 5 seconds to decide on a dog. When a dude names a dish after himself, well, you're a goofball if you don't try it, right?
I mean, look at this thing of beauty. The photo kind of sucks, but I didn't waste too much time gettin' fancy, I just wanted to dig in. This ain't Bon Appetit.



Straight up.
Italian Pastrami, Grey Poupon, cheddar and horseradish. Damn yeah. The snap on that dog was right on. The buns are locally made, and for this dog was slightly toasted. I was also told all the ingredients were local. The attention to detail made me wanna call all my good buddies back home.
Dougie Dog is legit. Dude has done his homework, and knows his dogs. He told me about a documentary he had just done about good ass dogs around the US of A, finishing it off by opening his own place. Right on.
I'm headed back soon, and I'm taking some folks with me. There's like, 10 other dogs I'm thinking about, and will just have to go apeshit over there one afternoon.
After that, I kept on truckin' and saw a bunch of people staring at a giant 35 foot TV screen and randomly breaking into nerve shredding renditions of "Oh Canada", while little Taiwanese kids played these huge ass drums that shook the ground and some old dude spray painted silver did "The Robot" to a crappy recording of "All Shook Up"by Elvis. Totally baffling day.

Wednesday, February 10, 2010

Clean Bobby and the Wienermobile

Buddies some serious dog melding went down at Frank yesterday. It was like some fucking Close Encounters type coming home stuff. Not unlike a wiener magnet was inside the building.The Eagle has landed and all that action.

Behold the most iconic hot dog shaped driving apparatus docked right up to our humble establishment. The oldest and newest dynamos in the sausage world meet as if eHarmony set this shit up.





And if that wasn't enough the fine folks at Oscar Meyer came round the next day and buddy Clean Bobby got to show off his latest Hot Dog ink whilst piping a tune on his teeny weeny whistle gift. Just like his ink says, ladies, "HOT"